INSIDE OUT . OUTSIDE IN .

By Christine Jayakaran

I'm a mild neat freak. I have to admit that right now ! I love keeping living spaces spacious, airy, unclutterred and alright... spotless. With three kids that is quite the challenge but I have found ways to curb my crazy and overlook messes. But the minute they are in bed all tucked in I go into Mr. Muscle mode. When I get to bed and when I wake up I like seeing a clean home. That's my mantra !

The disturbing reality that hit me last night was that while the exposed, open 'living' spaces were clean my wardrobes, Medicine cabinet, shoe shelves and kitchen cupboards were all in a disheveled and shabby state. While they did disturb me quite a bit I was just not able to commit to sitting down and getting to work on them.

For the simple reasons that well for one thing, they had doors hiding the travesty behind it and the second thing was that it was going to be a time consuming and arduous task.

As I sit to write this blog I realise though that so often we as humans tend to focus excessively on our outer being than our inner man. True, the outer being is what others see and we should be presentable and put together but I know for a fact that eventually what's inside will overflow to the outside. Let me rephrase that to sound less mystical.

My inner man will eventually dictate who the outer man should be !

So if my mind is constantly filled with self doubt and anxiety, even if I'm the most fashionable or good looking human ever, I will be struggling with a severe case of identity crisis and the signs will show. If my mind tells me I'm no good or not as good as so and so, my insecurities will soon get the better of me. I may lose good friends and acquaintances because of my fears and doubts. If my mind is distorted with unpalatable images and things you can't share with your spouse, a mentor or a parent then sooner or later that darkness will envelope your whole being.

I have been praying for a renewed mind which is kinda like putting clothes in the laundry. I don't get clothes out in the same way that I put them in !

I therefore want my mind renewed and refreshed every single day so that old prejudices, antiquated ideas, old wounds and damaging thoughts are washed out and I keep my mind open to the freshness that is all around me ! All around me I see so much potential for newness ! I just need to first work on getting rid of the old grime and be ready to be overwhelmed by the new.