NEED FOR SPEED

By Christine Jayakaran

You know how some folk on the streets of India are always in a hurry? They honk at everyone, always trying to get into the fast lane and swerving in and out of traffic so that they reach their destination first! I'm nothing like that! At least not on the streets. I'm all that and more privately. I will rush through a work-out to do the next thing on my list for the day. I will cook at top speed just to get out of the kitchen. I reply to emails as soon as they come so that it's done and off my mind. If I have a writing assignment I will work on it at one go so that there's nothing left pending. I need my kids to clear their rooms asap which never happens so I clean their rooms up so that the asap is immediate. While these could be harmless idiosyncrasies or idiosyn (crazies) what is disturbing is that this "speed" tends to cause anxiety when it translates into other, more vital, parts of my life.

I look to fix some relationships much like fixing a broken toy with quick fix glue. You know, stick it, keep it in a cool dry place for a few hours and voila - ready to use!! In relationships 'quick fix' does nothing!! Maybe some can be fixed via a phone conversation or a text but some may take years to fix and if I don't allow time to do its job I would only make the problem worse.

I want my dreams to come true NOW. My justification is that I'm working so hard on it and doing all the right things. So where's the growth? Where are the results I wonder? Why is nothing happening?

In the huge gap between my expectation and my reality rises the monster of disappointment and disillusionment.

So here's my solution. SLOW DOWN. I'm enjoying every single current, existing relationship. I invest in them and am enjoying how my circle of love gradually grows. I take time to sit outside my home and enjoy the view instead of just power walking and getting a workout in. I am living my dreams one day at a time, helping one person at a time, equipping myself by reading one book at a time. This way I take the pressure off myself to perform and succeed. (As I write this, I see the mess in my kids' rooms and I'm taking a deep breath, deciding whether to leave it be or 'whirlwind' clean it! Idiosyncrazy right?)

I don't know what you're in a hurry about. Maybe it's your career. Maybe you desperately need that promotion to go from here to there. Why not make the most of where you're at right now? If the promotion comes it comes if it doesn't well, the sun will still shine!

Have you been waiting to find your soul mate and in your hurry have you been browsing through potential mates on every website and stalking them pretty girls or buff guys on social media?Why not enjoy your singleness for a little while longer. Pursue the things you are passionate about while you wait.

I have decided to slow down - on every level. Not just to smell the roses but to pluck out the weeds in my life and allow myself and those around me to grow into everything we can be! (However long that takes!)